Gregory Orear is the managing editor for the Kirksville Daily Express.
Earlier this spring,
He was probably asleep, not “passed out.” Whatever. The end of this sentence is a bit of a quagmire, no? OK, so at least Grego spelled “La Russa” correctly. This is the best sentence of this column. It only gets worse from here, so put on your safety belts!
With a blood alcohol content of .09, La Russa was arrested and charged with driving while intoxicated.
He was charged with a DUI. That is the name of his offense in that jurisdiction. A professional journalist should be on top of this. GREGORY OREAR: Not on top of this.
A few hours later, before issuing an apology or even admitting his guilt, he walked onto the field for a spring training game and was greeted by the ambivalent Cardinal fans with a standing ovation.
Gregory Orear would have booed and hissed. Ironically, someone would then throw a beer at him. Ouch!
I'm not a parent, but I have no earthly idea what I would tell my young son or daughter if we had attended that game.
Son or daughter? Wouldn't it be easier to say "my child?" That sounds better. Greg, did you attend college?
"Daddy, why are they cheering and standing for the manager?"
Grego’s train of thought when typing this bit: “I want some fucking kids!”
"Well, he got arrested for drunk driving last night."
Grego knows that the “ambivalent Cardinal fans” weren’t cheering him for his arrest; rather, they cheered to show their support for a successful manager who had a spotless record until the night before. You know, like what normal people do. Should they have booed, hissed, and thrown octopi onto the field?
"But daddy, isn't that dangerous, against the law and wrong?"
Grego anticipates having retarded children. Like father, like son...or daughter.
"Um, normally."
Daddy's funny and sarcastic!
Now, a few days after a St. Louis Cardinal pitcher died when he drove his SUV into the back of a tow truck, it appears that same mixed message permeated far beyond the minds of nonexistent children.
Good columnists speak in an active voice. Gregory Orear speaks in what I call a “passive-passive-oh-my-god-he’s-licking-that-man’s-feet-because-they-look-dirty” voice.
According to autopsy results, at the time of the accident, Josh Hancock had a blood alcohol content of .15, nearly twice the legal limit. He also had a small amount of marijuana in the car, but further toxicology tests will have to determine if he was under the influence of that drug as well.
Just a minute ago, Grego said Josh Hancock was driving an SUV. In this paragraph, he was driving a car. Gregory Orear has more loose ends to tie than...well, the 2007 St. Louis Cardinals.
Regardless, Hancock had apparently exhibited this type of behavior in the past.
Dying in an automobile accident is a type of behavior? What the fuck? At this point in the article, Greg has not mentioned a single behavior of Josh Hancock.
Three days before this accident, Hancock was involved in another wreck in the wee hours of the morning outside an
Allegedly? No. He DID show up late to the clubhouse. Now, Grego, your passive voice is covering up facts. Also, it's more professional to say "early," rather than "wee."
As horrible and saddening this tragedy may be, it should not surprise us. In a society in which DWI laws are routinely pleaded away to lesser offenses and managers are applauded for violating those laws, why should we expect anything different?
(Guy in a crowd): “We live in a society where people have heart attacks and die all the damned time, often without any warning signs! If you ain’t surprised that DK died in ’02 from a heart attack, say yeyyyeeahh!”
Gregory Orear: “Presumably, I am not surprised!”
Uh, Greg..this IS a horrible and saddening tragedy. You said that it "may" be. Stop being a sissy!
By not disciplining La Russa for his behavior, the Cardinal organization on some levels condoned it and certainly did not send a message to the players and coaches that these transgressions will not be accepted.
Instead, it sent a message, on some levels, that these transgressions need to happen more often, since it was not embarrassing for La Russa, Walt Jocketty, and the rest of the organization. Grego, grow some balls, seriously. You sound like a candy ass.
But this is the same organization, formerly owned by a brewery, that until Friday afternoon, regularly included free alcohol with its post-game meals for players. Maybe they thought that after drinking their fill of free beer, these players call cabs or rub a genie bottle for a magic carpet ride because it is apparent they preferred to turn a blind eye to this problem until it was too late.
Most baseball organizations provide free alcohol after games. Grego, quit singling the Cardinals out for this. Are you a Cubs fan? I have a copy of the Post-Dispatch (a real fucking newspaper) with an article noting that fewer than a dozen beers are consumed during these post-game meals. Do the math. It’s not exactly a wild, fuck-Spiezio’s-hot-wife fiesta, is it?
Josh Hancock turned a blind eye to his personal problem of driving drunk before it was too late. That had nothing to do with the actions of any Cardinals player, or their manager.
While nothing can be done to undo this tragedy, something can be done to prevent it from happening in the future. They need to send a crystal clear message to players, and that would be done by one simple act: fire Tony La Russa.
Yes, “the future,” as opposed to “the past,” or “during the Civil War.” Firing a Major League manager because one of his players got drunk and drove into a tow truck is simple? Grego, you should do it yourself!
Forget about setting a good example and realize that, as manager of a major league baseball team, it is La Russa's job to develop and protect the million-dollar assets the team owner's entrust to him.
Basically, Greg is saying that La Russa should be the team's professional chauffeur. Either that, or he thinks La Russa should be on hand when his players are constipated: "Come on So, you can do it! Just squeeze my hands and push!"
La Russa did nothing while Hancock apparently exhibited destructive and eventually suicidal behavior. If Hancock developed an addiction to narcotics, which in turn affected his on-field performance, and La Russa about it and did nothing, he should be held responsible.
Um, he didn’t smash his SUV into that tow truck on purpose, asshole. Also, Hancock was fined for being late to the game three days before. Standard procedure.
AN ADDICTION TO NARCOTICS? ATTENTION: JOSH HANCOCK WAS A HEROIN ADDICT. READ
La Russa failed in his role as a manager. The problem isn't winning and losing, but managing the team and clubhouse.
Right. He should tuck every Cardinal into bed at night, not just David Eckstein. Grego, your article would have merit if if La Russa were managing the Kirksville Little League's Four Horizons Realty team. Oh, and if you knew how to put sentences together coherently.
He failed to deal with this situation until it was too late. And why? Because when the same thing happened to him, he got a standing ovation and a voice of support from management.
If the same thing happened to Tony La Russa, he would be dead. Do you see what I mean about putting sentences together? Jeez!
For him to have done anything different would make him a hypocrite.
So you’re saying he’s not a hypocrite? Wait..what the fuck?
And that's why he has to go.
“He has to go, because, for him to have done anything different than what he did would make him a hypocrite.”
